The Whole Parent Podcast

MOTHER'S DAY Shenanigans with Emily Vondy #89

• Jon Fogel - WholeParent

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Toddler parenting feels hardest when your child won’t listen, melts down over everything, or you’re running on empty trying to stay calm through the chaos. In this Mother’s Day conversation with Emily Vondy, we talk honestly about what parenting little kids actually feels like—and why so many overwhelmed parents feel both exhausted and deeply grateful at the same time.

From toddler tantrums and emotional overwhelm to screen time, mom guilt, nap traps, and the hilarious reality of raising little kids, this episode is full of relatable moments and grounded parenting wisdom. If you’ve ever hidden snacks from your kids, questioned every parenting decision at 2 a.m., or wondered if you’re “doing enough,” this conversation will make you feel a little less alone—and a little more confident in the season you’re in.

What You’ll Learn:
• Why connection matters more than perfect parenting
• How to stay grounded when parenting feels nonstop and overstimulating
• The hidden pressure modern parents feel from social media and comparison
• Why “enjoying your kids” can feel harder than it sounds—and how to reconnect
• Practical mindset shifts that reduce guilt, power struggles, and overwhelm

This channel is built around evidence-based parenting, emotional regulation, child development, and the real-life challenges of raising toddlers and preschoolers. The goal isn’t perfection—it’s helping parents understand behavior, stay calmer during hard moments, and build stronger relationships with their kids in ways that actually work in everyday life.

If parenting has been feeling loud, exhausting, or like you’re constantly second-guessing yourself, subscribe here so you have practical, research-backed support that helps daily life feel lighter, calmer, and more manageable—especially in the moments nobody prepares you for.


Check out Emily Vondy's Book: Nap Trapped!

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Mother’s Day Welcome And Setup

Jon @WholeParent

So Sunday was Mother's Day, and I wanted to give you a special treat here on the Whole Parent Podcast for all the moms out there. Instead of digging into like some parenting expert or something like that this week, or somebody who just wrote a book, and I'll have that back for you next week. We have a bombshell. I wanted to just spend some time hanging out. And to do that, I have one of my favorite guests of all time. It's Emily Vondi. She is a viral content creator. You've probably seen her stuff. If you're on Instagram, probably on TikTok. She makes some of the funniest mom content out there. And I think she says at some point during the interview that, or the conversation, it's not really an interview, that over 90% or 95% of her audience is female. Anyway, I know you're gonna love it because I loved it. I loved recording it. It was probably some of the most fun that I've ever had with a microphone and a camera in front of me. Emily is just the best. And I hope that you can rest for the next hour as you have your mom friend with you, making everything hilarious. Let's get into it. Welcome to the Whole Parent Podcast. Emily Vondi.

SPEAKER_03

Now here I am. I'm so excited, excited to be here.

Jon @WholeParent

Yes. So you are one of my absolute favorite like influencers, like true influencers. There's influence. Content creator, content creator. Content, you but you influence me. You influence me to me. Uh content creator, you're you're one of my favorites. And I feel like this is a kind of a first time for whole parent podcast that we don't have somebody on who's like just written a book about something. Or or who's like, you know what I mean? But you do have- No, I feel underqualified.

SPEAKER_03

I do feel underqualif qualified to sit here right now.

Jon @WholeParent

You are not even remotely underqualified. You might, you actually might be the the, as far as the content creation side, you might be the largest content creator we've ever had on Home Parent.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, what an honor. What an honor.

Jon @WholeParent

And like, I don't, I didn't tell you this. I was wanted your honest reaction, but did you know that your episode is our Mother's Day episode?

SPEAKER_03

That make that does make me like my heart want to explode. Oh, mama, if you're listening to this on Mother's Day, happy Mother's Day. I love you so much.

Jon @WholeParent

Yeah, I love it. Yeah. And you're here just like I your wife, like so. The thing that I get as a content creator all the time is people sending my videos to their husbands. So I always get people go, like, oh, you know, your what my wife just sent me this video, or I just sent you this video to my husband. And it's because like guys like to hear from guys, but I'm saying all the things that so many people have been saying, but guilty, guilty.

SPEAKER_02

I do that.

Jon @WholeParent

So so like that's like a total like that's where my my niche is. But when it when it goes back the other way, I get your videos from my wife. So so she was like taking the kids to the children's museum this morning. I have two that are not yet school age, and you have six kids.

SPEAKER_04

Mm-hmm.

Jon @WholeParent

Mm-hmm. This is insane to me.

SPEAKER_03

I know it's a very loud, busy, love-filled house.

Jon @WholeParent

We're gonna talk about it. We're gonna talk about it. But like my I have two that are not yet school age. So my wife is taking them, or they we we send our kids to a forest school, so they're not quite old enough for that. So my wife is taking them to the children's museum, and she's like, wait, you're gonna be you're gonna be with Emily today. And I'm like, Yes. So uh she's major jealous that that you are here, but I just want to ask you kind of like where you are today on a scale from like calm mom to like you're hiding in the pantry and you're eating snacks. So where where do you find yourself today with six kids? Like, how do you join us on this Mother's Day call?

SPEAKER_03

Okay, so this very moment, we got aunties here to play. So I'm actually like really calm. I have two older I have a twin sister and an older sister. They're both here right now playing with my kids. They're my literal village, so that's the only that's the only reason I can do this.

Jon @WholeParent

We do occasionally get whole parent exclusives. One of our recent episodes, I don't even know if it'll be published by the time that that your episode comes out. One of our recent episodes, we like some one of the parenting authors drops some epic lore that he actually went to summer camp growing up with another uh person who's been on the podcast, like another famous parenting author. And so so my epic lore moment here is when you do these videos where you're two people, is that actually you and your twin?

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, that's my identical twin.

Jon @WholeParent

No, not I'm joking.

SPEAKER_03

I'm joking.

Jon @WholeParent

I was like, I was like, I was like, wait, is this is this for real? Because I feel like because you do, but you do those videos so well where it really feels like you're playing off yourself. Yeah, I try.

SPEAKER_03

It's fun, it's a lot of fun.

Jon @WholeParent

I was like, I was like, man, is this like there's just two phones and we're just cutting together?

90s Childhood And Creative Freedom

SPEAKER_03

It's just this whole time. It's been my identical twin. No, my twin is actually uh she's a fraternal, so we don't, I don't think we look at anything alike, but some people think we do. But yeah, I have aunties here today. My my wonderful sisters.

Jon @WholeParent

So I like what was your life like growing up when you in your family? So, like what from from your perspective as like now you're obviously the mom of six, and and I I don't know how that happens. Like, I don't know how we who have lots of kids, I have four kids. Like, yeah, how do we get to this point? So, what was your family like growing up with a twin? What was your house growing up? Is it was it the same chaos as your house right now?

SPEAKER_03

It was definitely like peak 90s childhood. We were we I grew up in the country, so we were outside, sun up to sundown, playing in the woods. I feel like I definitely had a very like uh whimsical, creativity-filled childhood. It was absolutely like also cliche 90s childhood. We didn't really see our parents very much, you know? It was kind of like, so my gosh, I have wonderful parents, but it was like a different time. They were kind of like, go to your room and figure that out by yourself. Get out of here. You know what I mean? So, like, um, but but other than as far as like the setting, growing up in the country, being in the woods, love my siblings, built-in best friend, my twin sister. We had so much fun. It was very fun. We got into oh my gosh, the shenanigans we would get into in the woods. Um we'd be like down the street at our neighbor's farm, like playing in there, like they had cows, and we would go and play in the pond of the farm where like the cows go. I don't I don't know how I'm some of these things. I would like I would never let my kids play in a cow poop-filled pond. I I I survived, you know?

unknown

I survived.

Jon @WholeParent

But you know what's so funny is that like there's all this research, and some recent episodes of the podcast have been about like education in school and like our schools kind of killing that creative spark in kids, right?

SPEAKER_03

Yes.

Jon @WholeParent

I and I feel like a lot of the research that comes out is like actually, if you just like set kids loose in the forest with no adult supervision, yeah, you become incredibly creative. And so we were I see that in you. A lot of the like that you're making this content, you like you think in such creative ways to make this really enjoyable to watch relatable content. Like how much of that is just coming from like you had to come up with ways to entertain yourself.

SPEAKER_03

Oh my gosh, yeah. Oh gosh, and it is so interesting to think about because it's like wanting to find that balance of letting your kids kind of run wild in the woods while I feel like we're also like we're just more scared today, I feel like as parents. We're so scared of all the things because of we see everything on the the the the way the internet is. All the what ifs are like more seem more real, you know, in today's age. So we're just so scared, whatever. But I do try to find that balance of letting them be in the woods and like uh come up with imaginative, creative play. Because that's what, oh my gosh, that was like the one of my favorite things about my childhood is we would come up with whole storylines and plot lines. Have you seen like the reels where it's a girl, she's saying, How people think I played as a child? And she's like playing nicely in her room with two dolls, la la la la la. And she's like, what it really was like. And she's like in the woods, like talking to imaginary people. Hurry, we have to escape. Your your leg's gonna fall off, or I don't know, just like really. Yeah, that was like me in the woods, just really like getting into character. Oh my gosh, it was so fun.

Jon @WholeParent

Well, and I feel like that it it really like lends itself to like you see, you see kids who are so creative. And I think I think a lot about this right now because we've all just went through this like Artemis II going around Mars or going around the moon, and like like it's this is all setting up for like the next Artemis mission gonna land on the moon, eventually gonna like land on Mars. And like it reminds me that like NASA tr literally picks astronauts, not based on like who went to Harvard and who got straight aids. It's like they're like, So, how much time did you spend just like playing with like trash and scrap metal in the backyard? And there people are like, oh, like that was basically my whole childhood. And then they're like, You'd make a great astronaut.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, that is so fascinating. That's probably you so you send your kids to a forest school. That's probably all about like fostering that, right?

Jon @WholeParent

Yeah, oh yeah. I mean, that's that's literally why we do it.

SPEAKER_03

Is that we're just that is so cool. I love that. And you saying scrap metal, like I went, I made a whole like forest kitchen out of old scrap metal I'd find. Because like since we lived in like farming country, you'd find like old pieces of like machinery or just random rusty sharp metal, yeah, yes, like super safe. But I made a whole play kitchen of this old like scrap metal in like my tree fort. Just out it's so it's so that's so interesting.

Mom Promises That Don’t Survive

Jon @WholeParent

It is just a real it is a real part of childhood. So you are obviously a mom now. What is something that you swore that you would never do as a mom that maybe now you just do constantly? I don't know.

SPEAKER_03

Oh gosh, I know about constantly, but I did say like my kids are never gonna have McDonald's. They're never gonna have and I do really we do really do try to limit McDonald's just because I try to be like, I want to give them good fuel for their body. You know, I I do want to give them good fuel. But you know, we hit up some nuggies here and there. We do. We do. And I said, and like I was kind of one of those people that's like, oh, so McDonald's is poison, so is it's okay to sometimes poison your kids, you know? And then I'm kind of like, uh, I think it'll be okay.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, I think we'll be okay. It is okay.

SPEAKER_03

Oh John, oh my gosh, are you are you poison? Are you the one that's like don't ever it's poison? Is that you? It's okay for work. I get it.

Jon @WholeParent

I'm no. I actually just had on um this, or she her name is Michaeline Duclef. She wrote this book, Hunt Gather Parent, and then she wrote this book, Don't Mean Kids. Yes, and her booking kids is is all about how like I'm I I am now becoming an anti-screen parent because I like have seen what it's doing to my kids. Yeah. And I not like not like from like a moral hierarchy place, but literally just like I'm like, I'm like literally the 30 minutes of whatever peace and quiet that I'm gonna get now from them being on screens, I'm gonna pay for that for the next six hours. Like, I don't really want to do that. Yeah. Her book is kind of divided up into like like not giving your kid ultra-processed foods and not giving your kids screens. And I'm like, I like I really like the screens part, but I don't know about that uh that other part. I have I know. I do feel like so so no mac and cheese though.

SPEAKER_03

No, no, no mac and cheese? I know, gosh.

Jon @WholeParent

It is like what if I could what what about like just three to three times a week? Like like three four times a week.

SPEAKER_03

Once a month? Once a month? We we really do and gosh, I feel like all the people that are like really, really passionate about this. Side note, people the parents that are passionate about like never McDonald's, like you, you'd I love that. I love that for you. And and I could watch like I I could watch a video on my because our phones are listening to us, you know, or that's gonna pop up and be like five reasons why you should never give your kids McDonald's, and I'll be like, okay, I'm not gonna have McDonald's in for another year, you know? I'm uh I'm constantly learning. I'm constantly learning.

Jon @WholeParent

And then and then like tomorrow you're just like ah, but like it's like you have six kids, McDonald's gets expensive.

SPEAKER_03

I know. Well, yeah, so that's a huge reason why we actually hardly ever eat out because you know, well, five of them are like eating. My I my six is ten months old, so she's not, you know, having that kind of food, uh, anyways. But like, uh yeah, it gets it gets expensive to eat out for sure.

Jon @WholeParent

It's pricey. What what's that moment for you when you're like, I have definitely I'm definitely a mom now? Like I I like you're you're you're there and you're like I no, I'm here.

SPEAKER_03

I'm I'm definitely probably like oh man, oh how much I appreciate like getting all tucked into bed at like 8 p.m. All the kids are asleep, I'm like so cozy. And I I get the exhilaration I feel when I'm going when I go to bed early, it's like I I'm almost too excited to fall asleep. I'm like, oh my gosh, this is such a treat. And probably how excited I am about going to bed early is one of the things because you just so and then I that's probably like a thing with getting older too, you know.

Jon @WholeParent

Um I I uh the like uh I don't know, it was like maybe a month ago, I was like tired all day because my kids were up at five. Yes, and I like laid down in bed and I said something to the effect of like I'm just snug as a bug in a rug.

SPEAKER_02

I love that feeling.

Jon @WholeParent

And my and my wife was just like, what a wonderful never Don't say that again. She was like, she was like, We we should go open a bottle of wine because we are not those people.

SPEAKER_03

Right. No, I love the snug bug people. Pop off snug bugs. We love it.

Jon @WholeParent

Yes, yeah. So yeah, no, you just gotta like you you just tuck in at at 8 p.m. Just pull out your phone and scroll TikToks for four hours.

SPEAKER_03

Well, I try not to, I try not to do that. That's like I have my moments where I will do that, but I try to like, you know, I try to read instead of being my phone before bed, all the good things.

Jon @WholeParent

All the good things.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. I also have those moments where I'm like, I am up at 5 a.m. And the amount of like chaos that's happening around me while I'm still just in this comatose state of like I'm not awake. I I'm like laying on the living room floor, letting them like put a but all the clips we have in the house in my hair. I'm like letting them give me a makeover at 5 a.m. I'll have those moments where I'm like, I'm really, this is really we're really doing it. We're really at the hair salon getting a whole makeover at 5 a.m. You know? I'll have like full blue glitter eyeshadow, crazy hair, and I'm like ready for the day. It's sometimes it's a vibe. It's a vibe sometimes.

Jon @WholeParent

As a content creator, like you kind of are ready for the day at that moment. You're like, sure, if I get my phone out and just like amping my phone right now, like lights can't reaction. Lights can't reaction. This is gonna be how do you find time with six kids to make content? I don't even know how I make like I literally I don't know how I do any of things.

SPEAKER_03

Oh my gosh. I say that all the time. I I when people ask me, I'd be like, I literally don't know. I I will break it down to what I do know. For the longest time, I just tried to fit everything into nap time and bedtime. For years I did that. And that that that became unsustainable. Um as I just as our family grew. I just was so burnt out trying to do all that. Um, because you know, content creation and you do a podcast too. It is it's a lot. It's it might be more than what people think, the work that goes into it. So we do have I have a gal from our church that comes, I can I say nanny on the show. I get real. I always get heat when I say that.

Jon @WholeParent

Because it because it means different different things. It means different things. My wife was a nanny for for like for like a venture capitalist in downtown Chicago. And that was a like like getting flown to like Trinidad and Tobago with the kids. That is a different thing.

SPEAKER_03

That's a different right.

Jon @WholeParent

She was in college at the time, right? So she's like before she became a nurse. Now now she's not even a nurse, she's an artist now. But yeah, oh before all of that, she was like, she was like a nanny, and they were just like, so like Barbados. Like, like what what is your what is your May look like? You know? Yeah. And and we're not on that level.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

Jon @WholeParent

I so I think I think it means different things. We've definitely had people who are the consistent person who watches our kids regularly. And that's what you mean.

SPEAKER_03

Yes. So she comes two days a week. I have outside help. You know, she's coming two days a week, and I try to get all my filming, editing done in those two days. Um, I also have my twin sister who's here today. She like is kind of working with me with all the things. That's the recent thing we just kind of after I had my sixth, I was kind of like, but she kind of helps me. She like does it all. She's like my other brain cell.

Jon @WholeParent

Um I've had You just got just the two, just the two brain cells.

SPEAKER_03

We're just like the two brain brain cells working together. I feel like she's the only person that could do this this job of of she just kind of does a little bit of everything. Like my other all the all the little things. And it's such and it's such a blessing just to have my family, you know, my my sister, because she brings her daughter up with her when she comes. So it's just like, you know, the kids get to play all together, and it's like, oh, it's the biggest blessing. So I definitely have help to do this 100%. I'm not doing it all. I'm not, I'm not that I'm not that incredible.

Jon @WholeParent

Okay. I want to like do it's this is not a whole parent exclusive. We have done this one other time. In the episode where my wife was sort of kind of interviewing me, we did an episode like that fun for the whole parent podcast. It was audio only. So, so for those, those who are like, wait, I never saw the video of that one. Yeah, and it was just like sitting on our couch, and we just like pulled out a recorder and we're like, let's let's just see what we can do.

SPEAKER_03

I love that. You guys should talk about your birth stories together like that. I love a birth story. Sorry, interrupted. You guys should do that. People would love to hear.

Jon @WholeParent

You know what?

SPEAKER_03

If she likes talking about birth, sometimes it's actually hard.

Jon @WholeParent

Those are my guest spots. So I just did an episode. If you if if you're interested in the in the birth story for my youngest, she's 18 months old. Yeah. It's a wild story, including how I I I mean, it was at a so so I say it's a wild story, but it was at a hospital.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

Jon @WholeParent

Two out of my four kids were born at home.

SPEAKER_03

Okay, cool. So planned, intentionally?

Jon @WholeParent

Yes, yes, yes, yes. Planned, planned, intentional, intentional home births. Cool. One of them was like in the middle, like the very beginning of COVID. And so it was like either you have this kid at home or like you have no idea what you're walking into at the hospital. It was May May 2020, like it was a nightmare.

SPEAKER_03

Yes, yes.

Jon @WholeParent

But but my my most recent was born at the hospital, but I almost missed her. I I literally like helped deliver this child, but I almost missed her birth because I was getting Jimmy Johns. And so if you want to hear that, if you want to hear that story, the I think it was the Dad Edge podcast. I told that story. There was a bad thing. There's another birth story where I was like, we were installing a toilet toilet in my house while my wife was in labor. Okay. After her water broke, we were like, oh, we we actually you're not gonna be able to walk upstairs. We probably need to install that toilet.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

Jon @WholeParent

That we built you. Yeah. So so let's go do that right now while you're in labor. Hold this, hold this right here. Like, I'm having a contraction, I can't hold it right now. Okay, yeah. So so we definitely, you know, we did the first birth, was was just like like we both took the like obviously we took the day off, but like she goes in labor and we're like, take the day off, and we're like, what's going on on the block? Let's get it. Yes, so bougie. Yes, let's do these things. And then for like the the next kids, it was just like, like, should we call my mom now? I I don't know, can they make it here in time, right? Right. So it's a it's a different, it's a it's a different vibe.

SPEAKER_03

But but that's so fun. I love it.

Jon @WholeParent

I've never done rapid fire questions with a guest. So I'm gonna hit you with rapid fire questions, and then I want to talk a little bit about your children's book, and and yeah, and maybe we'll go from there. But here are my rapid fire questions. And for all the moms listening out there, you can think about your answers to this, this these questions. But rapid fire, here we go. What is the most overrated piece of parenting advice that you've ever gotten?

SPEAKER_03

Overrated, oh gosh, overrated piece of parent. Like, so it's like I uh uh side note, John, I suck at rapid fire because I talk so much and I and I think about this can be think too much.

Jon @WholeParent

This can be slow motion rapid fire.

SPEAKER_03

Of over overrated, like we don't like it.

Jon @WholeParent

Yeah, yeah, you're not here for it. Somebody gave it to you, and you're just like, no, thanks. Not here for it.

SPEAKER_03

Okay. Um oh gosh, I've never been a fan of like this is this goes into all sorts of things, but like the uh blind like blind obedience because I said so, that's really outdated. But I still feel like people do it. They said yeah, overrated.

Jon @WholeParent

They definitely do it. Okay, yeah. Most underrated survival hack that you have in parenting.

SPEAKER_03

Underrated survival hack. Oh my gosh. Okay, when in doubt, tub it out. Get get all the kids in the tub. Younger with the littles, like with the little ones, if it's just one of those days and nothing's going right and it's just crazy, we just we just take a tub. I get them in the bath, bunch of toys. Oh, and it's like, and you know what? They splash a bunch of water on the floor, perfect opportunity to clean your bathroom floors. And then you have a clean bathroom and the kids are happy with their sensory needs being met in the tub. It like works every time. When in doubt, tub it out.

unknown

Yeah.

Jon @WholeParent

When in doubt, tub it out. Just get the kids in water. I like that. I like that advice. And it can be outdoors too, I will say. Sure. Oh, yeah, for sure. Right? You can throw them into the pond at the neighbor's farm.

SPEAKER_03

With the poop with the cup poop with the manure. It would work. Yeah.

Jon @WholeParent

Okay, a hill that you will die on as a mom.

SPEAKER_03

Hill that I'll die on. Probably like, oh gosh, I I I will die on the hill of connec the Connect Before You Correct. And the moms deserve to delight and enjoy their children. Children are amazing. And sometimes when we're so like in the thick of it, and you can kind of lose sight of how delightful kids are, because you're like in survival mode. But I feel like you're missing out on this honor and privilege of enjoying them while they're young. And I and I feel like moms are worthy of that. They don't feel like, and I think framing it as something that you're worthy of, enjoying and delighting your children, kind of can help that disconnect sometimes. Sometimes I'll tell myself, I'm worthy of delighting in this. I'm worthy of enjoying them at this stage, you know? It kind of helps like it's almost sounds like a selfish way of thinking, but it does kind of help me in that when I need to rewire my brain in an un in an unconventional way. I don't know. He'll all the way.

Jon @WholeParent

I love that. Okay, before we get back to the rapid fire questions, we're gonna take a quick break and then we'll be right back.

SPEAKER_03

Awesome.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, should I not talk right now?

SPEAKER_03

Should I not talk right now? Listen to this. Everyone, he's got the deets. Get his link.

Jon @WholeParent

I love it. I love it. I love it. Yes, we are back with Emily Bondi. I love it. I love it. I love it. Um, we are doing rapid fire questions, but this has been a good it's been a treat having a lot of people. It has been a treat. It's a mother's day. My next two rapid fire questions for you are really, they're kind of the same question, but but just just go with it. What is a snack that you have hidden from your kids in the last week?

Troll Comments And Contentment At Home

SPEAKER_03

Ooh, I do have to hide pickles sometimes because my kids are also pickle people. And I have this, well, it's not it's not even really a pickle. They're not even gonna eat this. Why am I hiding it? I you never know. I got this dill-flavored sauerkraut and I've just been chowing down on this sauerkraut. Is that so Midwestern?

Jon @WholeParent

I love that. Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_03

And I have it hidden in the back of my fridge because I just know if they know it's dill flavored, maybe they'll just eat it all and I won't get to have it anymore. And I and I'd savor that dill sauerkraut.

Jon @WholeParent

I do. Can I tell you? I thought it was gonna be like cheesecake, but the fact that you sauerkraut is so it's so I no, no, no, no. This is why you asked the question. Why would I ask the question if I already knew the answer? Dill flavored sauerkraut. I love it.

SPEAKER_04

This is so good.

Jon @WholeParent

Okay, okay. I know that we're not supposed to lie to our kids. Okay. What is a lie that you tell your kids on the regular?

SPEAKER_02

Oh, the park is closed. It's closing.

unknown

The park is closing.

SPEAKER_03

Oh no, they're oh shoot. Or you know, if it's if they're if we if we've been there so long, sometimes they do resort to that. Oh, they're closing in 10 minutes. They gotta wash everything, they gotta wash all the equipment, they gotta hose it down.

Jon @WholeParent

And then you come back in the morning and and it's like and it's like it's rained overnight, and you're like, look, mom, they cleaned it.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, see? Just for us, you guys, just for us.

Jon @WholeParent

The park is closing. The park is closing.

SPEAKER_03

You know, hey, you know, I'm not proud of that one, but technically technically the park does close at some point. It does close. It is closed.

Jon @WholeParent

It's closed for you.

SPEAKER_03

It's closing.

Jon @WholeParent

It's closing for us.

SPEAKER_03

It's closing for us.

Jon @WholeParent

Management has has called it in.

SPEAKER_03

Yes.

Jon @WholeParent

Park's closed.

SPEAKER_03

You know what? Yeah.

Jon @WholeParent

Okay, weirdest thing that you've ever Googled as a parent.

SPEAKER_03

Oh my gosh. I Google, I I kind of Google all the like ailments. I'll all the like I Google too much probably with like, uh, there's this like red bump on my son's back. And you know, it kind of I I I'm constantly doing that a little bit.

Jon @WholeParent

Why does my kids' poop look so white today?

SPEAKER_03

Oh, the pasty poop. It's pale. That's a thing. John, it's a thing.

Jon @WholeParent

The pale poop. I know. It happens after they throw up because of like it's something to do with like their stomach, like the you like remove certain bacteria in their stomach when they throw up. The pale poops. The pale poops. Why is the poop so white?

SPEAKER_03

Oh my gosh, I have definitely Googled that. Lots of poop things, lots of random ailment things.

Jon @WholeParent

How long is it okay for my kid to go without pooping? Or is it okay for my kid to poop five times a day? Both things I've Googled.

SPEAKER_03

100%. Everything, everything you can think about about poop. Green poop, too much sugar, you know, all the poops.

Jon @WholeParent

Alright. Alright. I have a content creator specific one.

SPEAKER_03

Okay.

Jon @WholeParent

You have you have a large following, you get lots of views on your videos, you get lots of comments on your videos. Is there any like just unhinged comment that you can think back on where you're like it l maybe it made you laugh, it didn't offend you, but just like an unhinged comment that somebody dropped on Yes.

SPEAKER_03

I have one that's in my mind right now. And I don't necessarily know it's if it's unhinged, but it is pretty creative or clever. Um, a clever way to not insult. I don't take these as insults. Sometimes they are, but this one's not necessarily insult. Anyways, I have uh an old farmhouse. It was built in 1900. Some would say it's pretty outdated, but I kind of like that the vibe. Some might say that.

Jon @WholeParent

Some might say that.

SPEAKER_03

Some might say it's pretty outdated. You know, it's got a lot of green carpet, it's got a lot of oak. But I personally like the green carpet and the oak and then the the vintage, nostalgia, co coziness. Most importantly, my carpet is still getting thrown up on at least like 10 times a year.

Jon @WholeParent

So my I I also have a dog.

SPEAKER_03

I also have a cat. It's just, you know what I mean? Why are we, why are we replacing No, it's and it's perfectly good carpet. It's it has to get it probably still has like five years left of throw up on it, P, to be, to be happen to happen still. And I kind of like uh I don't even though I really appreciate a beautiful aesthetic home, love to see it. I like don't really subscribe to this idea that we have to constantly be updating and that there's more freedom in being con content. There's more freedom in practicing the art of contentment and and being thankful for what you have, operating out of a grateful heart. I try to do more so than like everything must go. We do have such an 80s home, though it's it's kind of ridiculous in a good way.

Jon @WholeParent

Um your kids are gonna remember that.

SPEAKER_03

I know it's very sometimes we'll go to like a friend's house and it's very this beautiful and modern. They're like, I can kind of tell that they like you know that they they like it. It's like, wow, they have such a new house.

Jon @WholeParent

I'm like, and Joanna Gaines are like looking at your house right now if they're watching the video, which I'm sure they're not, but they're watching the video and they're just and they're just like they're like, we could do modern farmhouse so good.

SPEAKER_02

Oh cover that thing in shiplap. Whitewash the walls with shiplap.

Jon @WholeParent

Joanna. Joanna, look, she's got six kids and she's famous on the internet. We got we got come on over. Come on over. We're gonna give her a 27-gallon or 270-gallon sink. She's gonna be able to she's gonna be able to wash her dogs and her kids in the sink at the same time.

SPEAKER_03

I would probably take that huge sink, honestly. Um, anyways, the comment. Someone, so whenever I like I have a video that kind of gets more views, on TikTok mainly is where I get kind of roasted by the youth, you know. Um the the they roast me for my outdated house whenever I have a video that and it's showing my house a little bit. And someone commented, is that your house or a lawyer's office from 1993? And I'm like, yeah, that is that is exactly the vibe I was going for. Thank you. I thought it made me laugh.

Jon @WholeParent

You reply to the comments. I love that. I love that.

SPEAKER_03

Sometimes I do. If they're funny, I I like I I have fun with it, you know.

Jon @WholeParent

If somebody comments something that's like so like like somebody commented on one of my videos recently, they're like, he only wears a hat because of his receding hairline, and I was like, that's true. Yeah, period.

SPEAKER_03

Period.

Jon @WholeParent

Like, correct. Like, no note. No note.

SPEAKER_03

The only other things I get kind of my only other kind of like laughable comments I get that are more supposed to be negative is my huge forehead. The whole my gigantic brain. I think it's fine, you know. It's technically got some real estate up there after the four, so it's technically, you know, like maybe a five, but I'm fine with it. My husband also has a huge forehead, and we were dating. I thought that we were gonna have these babies that were just all forehead and no face. And some of my kids, half their face is forehead when they're when they're little.

Jon @WholeParent

But there's that might be true of every baby, though.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, yeah. There's all foreheads.

Jon @WholeParent

The heads are so big.

SPEAKER_03

So they're so big.

Jon @WholeParent

There's like so many that yeah. I talk about this sometimes actually on on when I go into like the like why your kid, why your kid is born prematurely. Because like basically, when I say premature, I mean like in comparison to other mammals, like humans are born prematurely. Like we like our our babies are like worthless and helpless. And like a like so there's some you know, baby.

SPEAKER_03

Like elephants. Elephants are like two years, right? Or something like that? It's something crazy like that.

Jon @WholeParent

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So so like our babies are so so would they have to be born. Like basically, when people talk about the fourth trimester, it's like, oh, actually, that makes like if our babies were born after a year, it would make sense. Nine months is a little undercooked, like even if they come out, and it's because they have such big heads. Like, that's like actually the biological reason is like the evolutionary scientists are like, because they have huge heads, they have to get out of their birth command.

SPEAKER_03

Otherwise, you wouldn't be able to fit them out.

Jon @WholeParent

Yes, 100% we already sometimes can't fit them out.

SPEAKER_03

Right, right, at nine months. So you know that does make sense. Wow, yeah. So the big four heads more advanced, yes, they got giant noggins, giant brains. If then so they're very smart.

Jon @WholeParent

Okay, a toy that in your house that you hate more than anything.

SPEAKER_03

Oh gosh. Okay, I'm so uh annoying. I love the toys that have the most obnoxious songs, and they'll get stuck in my head, and I probably sing them more than the toys. And my kid will like it drives my husband nuts. We have this like play guitar. It's but you push the buttons and it makes like different, it says like the colors. So there's two notes on this play guitar red, red, red, red, red, red. And me and my kids will just do that probably for 10 minutes straight. But my sensory brain's like, yes, red, red, red, red. And they could do that for an hour, and I'd be just jamming out to the red, red. My husband goes nuts. Hide that, get that guitar out of here. He hides the guitar. I'm kind of like, bring it back. I miss the red, red bop. You know? I love the songs. I love all the obnoxious songs. Fisher Price has some really good obnoxious songs. They got some bangers.

Jon @WholeParent

They get um like they really do. Top top five top five best uh songs from Toys. Can you can you call them out right now?

SPEAKER_03

Oh my gosh.

Jon @WholeParent

Other than Red Red, I mean, which is top of charts in in the Vondi household.

Screen Time Seasons And Family Limits

SPEAKER_03

Well, Red Red's a hit. We like wishing you wishing you could be a purple monkey and a bubblegum tree, and oh, that one slaps. That one's like from that, like have you you've probably seen it. The one where it's like um a piano. I think that one's actually infantano or whatever. It's like a piano and it has a little thing and they can kick their feet on the little notes. Oh, that one really and then um there's an Elmo song that that we used to get stuck stuck in my head all the time. Oh, I can't remember it. The Elmo, he he actually R.I.P'd somewhere. I think my husband did confiscate this Elmo. Um, but anyways, that was a really good one.

Jon @WholeParent

You haven't heard him for a while. You haven't heard of a while.

SPEAKER_03

I miss him. He had really good bops. He had a lot of things.

Jon @WholeParent

You can run over to a Goodwill and and probably find him.

SPEAKER_03

I probably could find him. He he sang like, and he sang in Spanish. He had Spanish and English songs. My kids learned like a whole song in Spanish because of him.

Jon @WholeParent

So there you go. I love it. So yeah, I'm I'm thinking about like maybe you need to get like we need to get you like a Tony Box or like a Yodo player.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, dream.

Jon @WholeParent

We gotta get you because let me tell you, when the Tony Box, if basically the way that it works is a little figurines.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, my mom has one.

Jon @WholeParent

My daughter, my daughter is obsessed, she's 18 months, and she'll like put the figurine on and then she'll like switch it to the next one. But yeah, you switch the figurines, they start over at the beginning.

SPEAKER_03

Okay. Oh, so you want to get to the next one.

Jon @WholeParent

For the first song of each one, it's kind of obnoxious to change. Like, if you want to like skip a song, you have to like slap the thing on the sky. It's like you just whack it, and then Tony goes flying, like the little figure like is like in the fireplace. Yeah. But like it just plays the first song. Like, I hear the first songs because it's cycling through them.

SPEAKER_03

You're like, come on, let me get to the next.

Jon @WholeParent

I know, but she's just like she's just like and the Curious George song. Yeah, man, it's just like a bang or doom doom doom doom doom doom doom doom.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

Jon @WholeParent

Yeah, no woods round a bin. Yeah, yeah, curious George. Yeah, no, and then it's she's he's got a Mr. Rogers Tony, which just came out. Okay. So I hear like that that that da da da is the the the Mr. Rogers Tony. Yes, the classic in the neighborhood. And then and then there's just like a bunch, and actually you can create your own. Oh, I didn't know that. Yeah, the m and and this is true with Yodo player too, but you can like create your own. And the most played song is my nine-year-old came up with this song, it just totally made it up. He goes, This is our spaceship or our submarine, it helps us get around. It's really extreme. Cool. And that song gets stuck in everyone's head. And if I say any words that are related to these songs within 20 minutes of bedtime, my wife is like, Stop it.

SPEAKER_03

Because everyone will start saying it. Yeah.

Jon @WholeParent

Because if we like, and it's not just the kids, like I'm thinking like her bedtime. She's like, I will not go to sleep with the this is our spaceship or our submarine stuck in my head again.

SPEAKER_03

I love that. I love that song, and I love that he wrote it. He's a future musician there.

Jon @WholeParent

Okay, uh I don't I don't know if you're a screens parent or a not a non-screens parent, but is there a show that your kids watch that you are emotionally invested in?

SPEAKER_03

I I feel like everyone says bluey, of course. Everyone says bluey, I feel like, probably. Um, but that's probably that's probably the only and and we like we do oh gosh, I'm probably similar to you with screens. I I'll have we'll have seasons where we're like we're allowing screen time, but we have boundaries around it. And then we'll have seasons where it's like no screens at all. You know? It kind of it usually has direct correlation of how pregnant I am and how postpartum I am. Postpartum and how pregnant when we allow screens.

Jon @WholeParent

Um but Which is a lot, which is a lot of time.

SPEAKER_03

That's been Which is a lot for in the last decade. Yeah.

Jon @WholeParent

I mean, like you're talking if you're talking like first first three or four months postpartum, like that you're like pregnancy or postpartum, that's that's what six, seven years of your life?

SPEAKER_03

That's been like yeah, a lot of the last decade. So so we have like gone on and on. We've had had a decent amount of screen time.

Jon @WholeParent

What are all of your ages?

SPEAKER_03

This isn't a rapid fire question, but it kind of My oldest is nine, and so then it goes nine, nine, um, eight, nine, eight, six, four, two, and then ten months old. So it has been like just a very busy, very busy decade. It's been a busy decade.

Jon @WholeParent

Are we are we? I mean, this is maybe too vulnerable, but are we done?

SPEAKER_03

We can talk about that for sure. We that's definitely like more on the table than it ever has been. We're more I I'm more so leading towards yes, we are done, just because and you can probably relate and resonate with a lot of these reasons. Uh my heart feels like I could have all the kids, you know? My heart feels like but then it is one of those things that you're you you do have to bring logic into it and reasoning, you know. I I think my heart would have a hundred babies, but my head's kind of like, you know, let's uh I want to be a good mom. I want to not be too stretched thin. I want to I'm excited for the next chapter. I'm kind of like, I feel like my body has done a lot in the last decade. I'm kind of ready for the next. Yeah.

Jon @WholeParent

Your body has done a lot in the life. It's done a lot.

SPEAKER_03

It really has.

Jon @WholeParent

It's done, it's done, it's done its it's done its job. I've done his job many times over.

SPEAKER_03

I know. I always tell my husband, this uterus is retired. We're retiring the uterus, I think. Yeah.

Jon @WholeParent

So my wife and I, I think it's really the desire to move on to the next stage. So it's it's it's not really like we don't want to have another one. It's more like well if we keep starting over like with the Moby raps and with the diverse and with then like it limits. Like if I my kids were really into they they've been at school, they've been talking a lot about ancient Rome. And my son Ollie, who's my six, almost six-year-old, is is he's like, Well, uh I think I want to go visit Rome. Oh, cool. Yeah. And I'm like, and I'm like, okay, first of all, like just the plane tickets, like just outrageous. Oh my gosh. I just can't even imagine. Slow down.

SPEAKER_04

Slow down. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Jon @WholeParent

Yeah, like the cost associated with such a trip is just astronomical. But it's never even been on the table, and it's not even because of cost. Like it's been, it's like we haven't even gotten to the can we afford this. We we are still stuck in the like, we're not taking your 18-month-old little sister on a plane for on that long of a rate. Like we go to we go to Wisconsin Dells, and it's like and it's like throws everybody out of routine for for Oh.

SPEAKER_04

For sure.

Jon @WholeParent

So it's like, man, we're gonna like we're gonna like jet leg a kid who like is barely sleeping through the night. Like that's that seems that's not enjoyable for anyone. That seems crazy. But but we want to move on to that next phase of like doing big kid things. Yeah. Oh, and we want to do the big kid things before our nine-year-old is like 18. Like, yes, like he's he's gonna have a whole childhood where he's only surrounded by Oh, John.

SPEAKER_03

I literally say this to tell this sentiment to people all the time. Well, everything you're saying. With like, I want I don't want my older, and it's something I have mom guilt about, but I try to like, you know, I I my older kids, are they are they missing out on some of these opportunities because it would just be sometimes it's just not doable to take all the little ones with. So we something I've done to kind of help navigate that is we do like have where we'll do we'll do little special day trips with the older ones, have grandma, we have grandma with the younger ones just so they have some of that. But like for the bigger stuff like that, it is something that kind of is going to just naturally come with that next season. And I want my older kids to experience that next season um while they're still kids, while they're still kids, you know?

Jon @WholeParent

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

So I totally get that. I totally get that.

Jon @WholeParent

Yeah, and it's not like I'm not I'm not like trying to like fix their childhood by doing that stuff. Like it's literally just like I just want so you're so do you you have you're a twin, so you always had a built-in best friend. But are you are you are the twins the oldest in your family?

SPEAKER_03

We're the babies. We're just the baby, we're the babies of the bunch.

Jon @WholeParent

We're the babies. So that that's another thing. Like I I resonate with the baby of my family. My me and my wife are both the youngest. Oh, okay. And and so we resonate with like the babies, like the youngest. Interesting. But like sometimes we need to be taught by our oldest that like what it is to be an oldest.

SPEAKER_03

Interesting, yeah.

Jon @WholeParent

Like we don't know. We don't know.

SPEAKER_03

Right. Yeah.

Jon @WholeParent

My last rapid fire question. My last rapid fire question. Um man, I have two. Maybe I should just ask both of them. I'm gonna ask both of them. Do it. What's the time when your kid humbled you instantly?

SPEAKER_03

Oh my gosh, they humble me all the time, especially my six-year-old daughter. Oh like, I did a whole video about this one time, but like the one she was it was bedtime, and she was like just talking to me like, Mama, why do you like why do you wear the same clothes at nighttime and daytime? Like, why don't you get dressed for the day? This is probably like a postpartum season, you know. I'm just wearing like my pajamas all day, basically. And she's like, you know, Dada, he gets dressed, he puts on shirts with buttons, and he, you know, puts on a belt and blah blah blah, saying all the things that daddy does to get dressed. And I'm like, well, you know, I'm kind of in a season of life where I'm prioritizing other things and blah blah blah. And but anyways, the next morning, why don't you get dressed? Why don't they get dressed? Yes. So the next morning, though, oh my gosh, the next morning, I come down the stairs and she's already like sitting at the table. She's coloring, she's all dressed, of course, dressed to the nines, matching bow and matching dress. She's that girl. And she like the look that she gave me. Have you seen The Devil Where's Prada?

Jon @WholeParent

Yes.

Nap Trapped And The Meaning Of Rest

SPEAKER_03

Okay. You know when she when Emily, Anne Hathaway walks into the her the gal's office for the first time, and she gives her this like lookover, like up and down, like totally just judging everything about what Anne Hathaway's wearing. She's wearing this like blue sweater and just something that's really unfashionable. That is the look my daughter gave me. And I like stopped in my tracks and I was like, oh my gosh, she's totally just judging me right now because I was still in my pajamas. And that's why I like slowly just walk, turn around and go back upstairs and get dressed. It felt like I I I really didn't know.

Jon @WholeParent

It's such a nice like, like, like I so I I have heard this experience and the sentiment given by women in my life of just like when you walk down the stairs and your parents give you that, like, you are not wearing that out of the house look. Oh, sure. That is what your daughter gave you. She was like, You are not. You're not wearing that. You are not going to drop offline.

unknown

No.

Jon @WholeParent

Looking like this.

SPEAKER_03

It was and it was almost like looking at me like, see, I told you. Like, look at like. Like just spare, oh my gosh. Vindicated. Okay. Yes.

Jon @WholeParent

Last one, last one of my rapid fire, and then I want to talk about your book and and we can kind of fade out. But uh what's something that that as a parent should should not be funny, but totally is.

SPEAKER_03

Oh my gosh. When they like anytime they I I also did it, I also did a video about this, but like when my kids give just the sassiest comeback sometimes and they're like just so creative with it with some of these comebacks, and you you shouldn't laugh because they're kind of they're not they're not using very nice words or they're kind of being disrespectful and you should not laugh. But oh my gosh, I crack every time. I I try to I try to cover my face, but like or it was a while ago, I think, where my the six-year-old daughter, it was her again, she was like just flipping the bird at the dining at the dinner table. And my other kids were like, Nora, you know, you can't do that. They kind of knew that you're not supposed to do that. And she's like, What? What? And I'm trying hard not to laugh. And she's like, she catches on that I'm laughing.

Jon @WholeParent

So she's doing it more just flipping for the for those who aren't from the Midwest, flipping the bird is giving somebody the middle finger. Is giving somebody the middle finger. So she's so she's just throwing it up.

SPEAKER_03

She's just at the dinner table, double double middle fingers.

SPEAKER_00

Double double testing it.

SPEAKER_03

Yes. And so and I'll thumb out or thumb in. Um, what's that?

SPEAKER_00

Thumb out or thumb in.

SPEAKER_03

She was like, she was thumb, she was thumb in. She was full sending. That's aggressive. She was full sending these middle fingers. And I like, I was I could not keep it together. So I was like, sweetie, my husband, sweetie, can you come help me? You know, and then he kind of he kind of came out and was able to diffuse.

Jon @WholeParent

He was the he was the serious one.

SPEAKER_03

We're like, he's like, you guys, this really isn't funny, blah blah blah. And I'm like, yes, you know, your father's right. This is not funny. And he's like, I'm looking at you. I'm looking at you, sweetie. This is not funny. Sometimes it is funny. Uh oh my gosh.

Jon @WholeParent

Anyways, this has been so fun. I have one more question for you, but before that, can you tell us a little bit about your children's book that's available for pre-order right now?

SPEAKER_03

I guess I would love to. So this is oh my gosh, just been like such a dream couldn't come true, first of all, that having this opportunity to do this, but it's called Nap Trapped. It's about a mother koala. She has four kids who fill her life with laughter. Um, I was gonna do like six kids as true to my life, but I thought like, I don't that might be I don't know how relatable that is. It's like we kind of have a lot of kids. So I thought maybe four is some more. I love all the kids, obviously.

Jon @WholeParent

If koalas had four kids, like we would the koalas would not be extinct. So I think that this is like a this is like a like this is like a very potent, yeah. Yes, give her four kids.

How Relatable Mom Content Gets Made

SPEAKER_03

At least four, at least four kids. I wanted to have and four, that's how what I thought, like before I got married, I always thought I would have four kids, and then you know, I just never stopped done, I guess. Yes, but anyways, so it's basically the the sentiment of a mother being nap trapped who has a super busy life, and it's this this struggle between doing all the things and you're pulled to do all the things constantly, and that can take you away from being present with your kids. And and even when you do try to be present with your kids, it can rob you of the joy of being present with your kids because you're thinking about I could be doing this right now, I could be doing this right now, I could be doing this right now. But sometimes if you just allow yourself to kind of rest in that moment of being nap trapped, which oh my gosh, I could cry just thinking about it. Being nap trapped is something that I'm gonna look back on when all my kids are older and just like, you know, the being able to kind of sit in those moments with them, you kind of you realize just what an honor and privilege it is to even be nap trapped. This is an honor. This is an honor right now that I can kind of take in this moment with my baby, all the all the hours spent rocking my babies and and the endless things to do, even though like when they pile up, it does, it is stressful and they do have to get addressed at one point. At the end of the day, we're not gonna look back on our life and think, oh, I wish I would, I wish the sink would have kept stayed clean. I wish I could have kept up with the laundry better. You know what I mean? You're gonna look back at the nap trap moments. So that's kind of like this the very sentimental side of the book, but it's also like really fun. It's all I obviously wanted it to be super fun for kids to read. So it's got like shenanigans and whimsy and like a pet frog, a pet frog that gets a bath and then jumps out and causes a little chaos.

Jon @WholeParent

I love it.

SPEAKER_03

So it's really fun. It's a really fun.

Jon @WholeParent

I mean, you're making you're you're like literally making me tear up because we just stopped getting we just stopped getting nap trapped for the first time in nine years. Oh, yeah. So like, you know, I think there was a period where we weren't being nap trapped for about nine months between my first and my second, because that's the biggest gap. But but uh we held all of our kids for all their naps, which is a crazy thing to say to to people who don't get it. But people who get it, they're like, I get it. And it's not like we weren't working, like we were like on our on our little devices, sending all of our emails, in some ways not being nap trapped anymore has meant that like my email inbox is is a travesty.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, I have a really I can have a really productive nap trap sometimes for sure. 100%.

Jon @WholeParent

Like I have this, I like like I've basically retired my standing desk that was in my office, or I I call it an office, it's an unheated porch, it was freezing, my hands would freeze. But like I had this unheated porch where my head this standing desk and I like wrote books, like I've written books, nap traps, and so I love that. And so I have I have like this real we stopped being nap trapped, we retired the Moby Wrap. And for those who watch my content, like I've not talked about that yet because I'm not ready to talk about it.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, you know it's gonna be like, oh gosh, that I so I I yeah, I know, I know exactly what I'm saying.

Jon @WholeParent

I did I did 10,000 hours in the Moby Wrap I calculated.

SPEAKER_03

So we John, we are cut from the same cloth. I did like a whole like I wanted to add up the amount of hours spent um uh rocking my babies to sleep. So like I'll I'll I wear my babies all the time too. I'll wear them I rock. I we always have some form of contact with napping, either if you're putting them down for a nap and then trying to transfer them or wearing them the whole nap. Anyways, yes, um, I try to calculate all the hours spent like rocking my babies. And oh gosh, what was it? It was like, and this was m after baby number I think five, where I calculated this, so it's even more now, but it was over two years, I think two years of like uh of spent doing that. And I just was thinking, like, what time, what beautiful time spent. I'm not gonna regret that at all, you know?

Jon @WholeParent

I love that. I love that so much. I love that so much. People are not gonna understand this when they listen to this, but like I think I think that we get it, and that's enough. Okay, now last question for you how do you come up with your content?

SPEAKER_03

Oh my gosh. I like I don't even know. I my my husband says sometimes, I wish I could like be in your brain for a day. And I'm like, I don't know if you want to be in my brain for a day. It's a lot of the times the ideas will just pop in my head very, very randomly, no rhyme or reason. I could be up in the middle of the night breastfeeding, I could be doing the dishes, and it'll just pop in my head. A lot of the time it's like um inspired by everyday life, everyday moments. And like, like I just did this video about when you're super cozy in your bed and you're kind of like, well, I do this thing where I like kind of cricket my oops sorry, where I kind of like cricket my feet. Like they call it cricketing, I guess there's a term for it. Where you kind of like, anyways, I I was doing that one night and I was like, what if I'm just my feet were kind of cricketing, and I was like, what if my foot just like randomly like pulled in like a little candle and and like lit a candle and like started uh making it a cup of tea, my feet.

Jon @WholeParent

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

Anyways, and so I was like, that I could do that, I could that I could put that into a video somehow.

Jon @WholeParent

So anyway, it's like every well, and I I think like it's what you're saying is it's just like everyday life. Yeah, yeah. Like it's the and and this is I think why I value just like the moment for me to gush on like you as a content creator, but I I think the reason I value your content so much is because so often my feed is just full of people who really look like they have it all together. And I know it's fake, right? Like I like because I'm a content creator, like I know that it's not real, but actually, like that's not how brains work. I can know that all I want.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

Jon @WholeParent

It's the subconscious of like I'm scrolling through and I'm seeing those travel influencers with their three kids in Rome, and they don't post the parts about like, so actually, this is on day seven because the first six days were a nightmare because like and so I but you see like all of the like and and everybody who's getting you know all of this money on brand deals, and everybody who's getting all this stuff and they're living these perfect little lives, and like here's how we travel to California because my my husband's a like a pilot and we fly in our private plane, right? And it's like all these things that make you feel like I'm not doing like I'm failing. And then here comes Emily's content appearing on the screen that's just like, no, actually, life is ridiculous. It feels so relatable because you do come. I like I'm just realizing this in the moment, but it's because you come up with it from everyday life. And so when you say, like, let's play the no arms and no legs game, yes, like we love that game. I like I've I've played that game. My kids call it the potato game, where you have no arms and no legs, and you're you can't you have to and how somebody asked my kids at church, like, well, how do you win? And they're like, by staying in your lane.

SPEAKER_02

Oh, period.

Jon @WholeParent

So, like when you make a video like that, it's just I feel like it So what would you what would you say to moms? I guess I have one more question. What would you say to moms who are like watching their their feed and maybe they see your content, but yeah, but the majority of their content that they're receiving is like life is perfect for for these influencers, and then they land with you.

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SPEAKER_03

Oh gosh, yes, I guess I would tell moms anytime like and this is uh it almost is contradictory to the question you asked, but it's something that's helpful for me when I do get in that mindset where I'm scrolling and I see I struggle with when I see like um kind of videos of moms that seem like the ones that get me, it's like it are like the sourdough making or get everything organic from scratch, oh kick cooking, and their their kids are involved in the cooking, and it's like, oh my gosh, that's not my strength. Um, you know, and I feel like, oh, but they're so sometimes that will get me, or you know, like the you know, the very uh, you know, beautiful aesthetic homes or whatever. I when you're scrolling and it starts to and you do start to kind of fall into that comparison trap, and I do firmly believe comparison is the thief of joy for sure, you you do have to just get off your phone. You do have to get off your phone. And I know that's contradictory to like, well, then you see my video, you know, but like sometimes getting off my phone is what I need to do to be grounded again. And understanding it's not real life, you're so often seeing the best, the best 10% of someone's life, what they're choosing to put out there. And uh and people are naturally gonna want to put out their best. Um, I actually, John, like get the comment a lot. And you probably get this comment too. How do you ever do you ever lose it? How are you such a like a calm, chill, happy parent all the time? I get that comment all the time. And I almost sometimes it makes me feel like I don't want people when they're scrolling and maybe seeing my happy, joyful self to feel make them feel bad about theirs themselves, you know? So like even if if if someone's listening and it's and that's resonating with them, like that when I am having a hard time parenting and and very overwhelmed and doing something that I like, I I very much have to apologize to my kids sometimes, you know, when I can't self-regulate, if I raise my voice in a way that I didn't like, I apologize to my kids 100%. And in that moment, I'm not getting on my phone, really. Maybe I should like be better about talking about it after the fact so that but I do I don't know, it's hard.

Jon @WholeParent

Like you don't want to get out of that moment. No, my wife, my wife trolled me viciously for this because she's just like literally, you are like your content is fine. And she doesn't like hate my content, like, but she's like, it's fine, it's fine to like talk about the brain or whatever. But like literally, if people could see you apologizing to your kids, like do you understand how many millions? Like, if people could see you in those moments, like do you understand how many millions of views? And and like you know how you know how easy it would be to sell your book if people could actually see you see it, see it in action.

SPEAKER_03

But you want to protect it, you want to protect that. But but I can't, like, I can't make content in those moments. I can't either. I can't either.

Jon @WholeParent

Like, if I'm making content, like like that's a different part. Like, I don't know it needs to be separate. Yeah, why aren't you making content with your kids? And nobody's like out here be like, why aren't you making content with your kids more? But but I'm like, I'm like literally, I don't know all those moms who do the like their phone, their phone is like just showing them while they're like talking to their kid and they're like having a big they're having a big conversation. I'm like that instinct to reach for your phone instead of reach for your kid, I can never relate to. And I'm not saying that they're bad, but I cannot relate to it. Yes and like I will never be able to make good content like that.

SPEAKER_03

No, I I 100% agree like and and resonate with all that. It's never my like first reaction or instinct or even really desire to do that in the moment. Um, I think like in something that you probab maybe you've even done and talked about is like after the fact, the next day or something, and you're kind of rehashing, I think that can be just as effective. I don't I don't necessarily think you need to, I don't ever want to me personally, um, even though I know that those videos are probably helpful to see for a lot of people, I don't want to bring content into the that space. I I want to like protect it. It's it's like a sacred sacred. Yeah, yeah. Um, anyways, so gosh, that was a very long. I feel like we keep getting on rabbit trails. But um, no. If if you do, if you yes, if you um are a mom that stumbles upon across my page, I hope that you're just like, I hope that you're seen, I hope that you laugh, I hope that you're filled with joy because humor is such a gift. Humor is such a gift, and little pockets of joy are such a gift. I hope I can be that to whoever stumbles upon my page.

Jon @WholeParent

I love that. I'm like thank you so much for being on the whole parent podcast.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, this was so fun. Thank you. This was so fun.

Jon @WholeParent

Thank you for your time listening to the whole parent podcast today. I hope you got something out of it. I have a couple quick favors to ask of you as we end the episode. The first one is to jump over on whatever podcast platform that you are listening to right now and rate this show five stars. You'll notice there are a lot of five-star ratings on this show, whether it's on Spotify or Apple Music or Apple Podcasts. We have a ton of five-star ratings, and it helps our podcast get out to more people than almost any other parenting podcast out there. And so it's a really quick thing that you can do if you have 15 or 20 seconds, and if you have an additional 30 seconds, I'd love to read a review from you. I read all the reviews that come through. If some if you particularly like one part of the podcast or you like when I talk about something or whatever, imagine that you're writing that review directly to me. The second thing that you can do is go and send this episode to somebody in your life who you think could use it. Think about all the parents in your life. Think about your friends, your family members who could use a little bit of help parenting. It's vulnerable to share an episode of a parenting podcast with them. I get it. But imagine how much better your life is as a result of listening to this podcast, of following me on social media, of getting the emails that I send out. You can share that with someone else too. And so I encourage you, just go over, shoot them a quick text, share this episode with them, or share another episode that you feel like is particularly relevant to them. The last thing you can do is go down to the link show notes at the bottom, and like I said in the mid-roll, you can subscribe on Substack. It's$5 a month or$50 a year. Uh I don't have that many people doing it, and yet the people who are doing it have made this possible. And so if you like this episode, if you like all of the episodes, if you want them to continue, the only way that I can keep making them is through donor donor support, free will donations to the podcast. Please, please, please, please, as you're thinking about the end of this year, as you're thinking about your charitable giving, I know I'm not a 501c3. You can't write it off on your taxes, but if you'd like to give me a little gift to just say thank you for what you've done this year, the best way to do that is over on Substack. Again,$5 a month,$50 a year. It's not gonna break the bank. It's probably less than you spend on coffee every week. Definitely less than you spend on coffee every week. Maybe uh less than you spend on almost anything, right? Five bucks a month is very, very small, but it goes a long way when it's multiplied by all of the different people who listen to the podcast and sending that over to me. I get all of that money. It's just my way of being able to produce the podcast, spend money on equipment, spend money on subscription fees, hosting fees for the podcast, all of that stuff. Email server fees, all that. So, if you're willing to do that, I would love it. Thank you so much for listening to this episode, and I'll see you next time.

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Jon Fogel

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